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Petzal: One Deadly Flashlight

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January 25, 2010

Petzal: One Deadly Flashlight

By David E. Petzal

Just when you think you've seen everything, something like this comes along. Anything I could add would be superfluous.

Comments (59)

Top Rated
All Comments
from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

I want one

+2 Good Comment? | | Report
from Brittle wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

that was cool he opened it and i was like wow a GUN

+3 Good Comment? | | Report
from SL wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Just some more paramilitary junk that is of absolutely NO use to the typical hunter.

-4 Good Comment? | | Report
from buckhunter wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Junk? If I had that night crawler hunting none of those little b@st@rds would get away.

+5 Good Comment? | | Report
from Clay Cooper wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

I LIKE THAT!

Barrel is less than 16 inches

DARN!

+2 Good Comment? | | Report
from Woodstock wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

For the price of a silly gizmo like that, I could pay for a really cool hunt somewhere.

0 Good Comment? | | Report
from Woodstock wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

For the price of a silly gizmo like that, I could pay for a really cool hunt somewhere.

-2 Good Comment? | | Report
from PbHead wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Is it a holster? A case? A flashlight container? Wow! I bet the boys at the BATF will being staying up at night to figure this one out.

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from Sb Wacker wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Great toy. Terrifying beard.
SBW

+6 Good Comment? | | Report
from crm3006 wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

What is the price? Probably pay for a good elk hunt and licence for what you would give for that gadget. If it was built around a Kimber platform, maybe.

Yo-Proud of you, sonny. Three words without a misspelled one, and not one yuk yuk. Do you think you need a big bad hideout gun to protect you from your Sasquatch relatives, irritated Irishmen, or just midget poets?
Have a nice day, yo!

+3 Good Comment? | | Report
from gman3186 wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

thats awesome and for our guys over seas thats another gun they can pack with them and one that does not take much room at all

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from WA Mtnhunter wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

I think someone just poked the yellow jacket nest.....

+3 Good Comment? | | Report
from willkillsdeer wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

some body better tell James bond somebody shanked his gun

+3 Good Comment? | | Report
from willkillsdeer wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

some body better tell James bond somebody shanked his gun

+2 Good Comment? | | Report
from JohnR wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

That's old news. I saw that demo a year ago but I have to admit I sure would like to own one.

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from fitch270 wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Gives new meaning to "concealed carry".
I wonder how many people would pull a Plaxico on themselves trying to open that thing up.

+5 Good Comment? | | Report
from Jim in Mo wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

No caliber mentioned but of course it must be 9mm, cool for me I'd love one for my evening walks.

+2 Good Comment? | | Report
from O Garcia wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

except for the part where he says "folding machine gun". already too many people are confused about machine guns, leading to many types of civilian firearms being banned as assault weapons.

but it's cool. would make a cool "secret service" type weapon. make it a 10mm Auto and our advocate Ted Nugent would be jumping up and down (he's a Glock 20 fan).

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from O Garcia wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

and survival weapon, of course.

+2 Good Comment? | | Report
from Carney wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Sort of makes the "MagLite" billy club concept seem like the dark ages!

So it maybe isn't at the top of my list but how could a guy not want one?!?! I'd carry it in my back pocket for sure!

+2 Good Comment? | | Report
from Zermoid wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Not useful for hunting????

That depends on WHAT you are hunting and WHERE........

:-)

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from Amflyer wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

To all of you that think this is stupid...keep in mind that the name of the magazine and website is "Field and Stream." What do you expect to find?

0 Good Comment? | | Report
from ingebrigtsen wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

seems bulky compared to a glock 18.. but more controllab le in fullautofire.. nothing special bout it but the obvious camouflage of looking like something harmless..

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from Bella wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Reminds me of a toy I had when I wuz a lil girl, back in the 60's. The "radio rifle" capgun toy looked like a radio of the day, but press the secret button and FWING the stock flips down and the barrel pops out! This was a toy associated with "Man from U.N.C.L.E." about the same size and coloration as the gizmo featured.
I'm certain it would be useful in some situations, but If I had a pistol in my pocket and needed it badly all at once, I wouldn't want something I'd have to unfold before I could put lead on target.

+4 Good Comment? | | Report
from SL wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

"To all of you that think this is stupid...keep in mind that the name of the magazine and website is "Field and Stream." What do you expect to find?"

Stories on gadgets that can be used while hunting and fishing that's what. This particular gadget has no use in either. Of course there are those these days who think it's cool to hunt deer with and AR-15 or AK-47, and many magazines are spewing a similar tune also to help attract advertising dollars. All BS in my opinion that will probably doom the true sportsman and bring him down to the same level as the many Rambo wannabe's out there. Very sad.

0 Good Comment? | | Report
from elmer f. wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

W O W !!! I NEED-A-WANA-GOTTA-HAVEA ONE OF THOSE! I THINK THEY SHOULD GO AHEAD AND PRODUCE IT. IT WOULD SELL!

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from Jere Smith wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

To the people who think this is a bad Idea, bear in mind that the world as we know it now... is much more dangerous then the one us "Ol Fahts" remember fondly. I for one would not buy it but I never leave the house without at least ONE or more of my pistols anymore. Also carry in plain sight either a "Tire Thumper" Multipurpose Tool ;) or 6 Cell Maglight in the truck. THINK before you speak.

+2 Good Comment? | | Report
from Flashpowderhal wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

The really sad thing is you guys are fighting among yourselves. That makes the anti-gunners really happy.

You'll let them ban guns that look like AK's and AR's, then next month they'll come for your Remington 870's and lever-actions. Remember, "We need to hang together, or we'll HANG together."

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from SL wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

"We need to hang together, or we'll HANG together."

You probably WILL hang way sooner if you hang out with the rambo crowd than if you stick to the time tested hunters/conservationists. Your choice, though.

+2 Good Comment? | | Report
from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Moshie ,. well said

Short crotch,. a poet you aint
But a fool ??? U bet
Your just not bright little man too many mistakes

As I say dont gamble
but I would take odds now one day in the future your standing around drunk,. shooting your mouth off, picking your nose and eating it.

And all of a sudden you hear "YUK YUK"
right behind you .
Probably makes sence to start wearing "depends" ole boy If you don't already ,. YUK YUK
By the way your new name is some cirlces is
the weiner dog that might,. YUK YUK

IE: previous post
A friend and his wifer compared you to their toy weiner dog . barks at everthing acts like he weighs 80 lbs with 12" schwartz ,.. but pi$$es himself every time someone knocks on the door,.or it thunders.

Yup that would be you little man,.

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Fash powder And SL ,. of course you have the right mentality
but you have to admit ,. thats one cool gadget.

Best for law enfrcement homelansd security etc etc.
ask that former NY City Cop ,.Polumbo? ( maybe )
At times the bad guys better armed than the good guys.
It would be a very good alternative to .
A call coming to dispacth saying shots fired
Im out gunned,. need back up ?
Other than that your right .
Unless,.. you could get that thing to fire rubber bullets.
Great short range detrerent to underware bombers

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from JD wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Seems like another solution just looking for a problem :-}

+2 Good Comment? | | Report
from hengst wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

What Moishe said !!!! Magpul does not make junk alot of us in my unit have spent a litle bit of cash on magpul products and have not been let down.....Anyone wanting one of these might want to consider a concealed weapons permit

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from Amflyer wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

SL, my post was most definitively tongue-in-cheek.

Cheers

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from crm3006 wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Oh no, yo-
You have just blown your spelling attaboy all to hell, and never said why you need the James Bond hideout gun.
Sounds like your tutu is all in a wad. Should I write more verse to soothe your troubled soul?

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from IowaGuy wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

And the practical, legitimate use of this thing is???????????????

0 Good Comment? | | Report
from WA Mtnhunter wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

crm3006 and Yohan

You guys are killing me! ROTFLMAO

If I see someone in the future unfolding a little toolkit/flashlight combo in my direction, I might just have to issue one each double tap with a closer! LOL

Moishe:

Absolutely! The thugs of the world should take notice!

+3 Good Comment? | | Report
from WA Mtnhunter wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

IowaGuy

That should be self-evident.....

+2 Good Comment? | | Report
from WA Mtnhunter wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Hey Yohan,

Skip down a few posts and analyze our new friend 'Arcamedies'. Might be a hoot for you and the Doc.

Best regards,

WMH

+2 Good Comment? | | Report
from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Wa Mtn Hunetr

WTF? Over
Who? what? is Arcamedies.?
Looked dont see ,..

Just had a slug of busness hit so time will be limited here for a while.

: ) Just checked into see if the killer Wiener dog was licking his own 3 " d k again yuk yujk

0 Good Comment? | | Report
from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

wa mtn hunter
from above rotflmao?

Romeo , oscar tango foxtrot ( time zone cst utc +6 ) Lima mike alfa oscar ? again wtf ? over

0 Good Comment? | | Report
from crm3006 wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Yo- You asked for it, you got it! Have a nice day!

THE TROLL
By crm3006 (The Poet Lariat)

Part III

A pismire sized brain in an over thick skull,
no wonder yo's writings are stupid and dull.
His fantasy life, as composed by himself,
would put a good novel right back on the shelf.
However, yo's writing was nothing but fiction,
horrendous in spelling, and syntax, and diction.
His mythical deeds, as written by him,
Just barely left out, he taught fish how to swim.
Yo was a great HERO, in his mind, at least,
but all of the bloggers thought yo was a beast.
In this supposition, they were not far wrong,
for yo yo had been with the trolls for too long.
Subsisting on nonsense, lived under a bridge,
'til even the trolls kicked him out on the ridge.
Where yo yo was forced to live under a rock,
whilst typing his stupid, and ill composed schlock.
The Sasquatch side of yo's family, you see,
had banished young yo yo when he was but three,
for misdeeds so blatant, and mischief, and crime,
no one can describe them without lots of time.
But yo, in his duncical, ignorant way,
was going to have his political say.
"An Internet troll is what I'll become,
and though they don't read me, and call me a bum,
I will bother the masses and spread out my hype,
and to make it the worse, I just cannot type!"
So, equipped with computer, and on to the ‘Net,
old yo was the stupidest poster as yet.
Until he encountered a man on the blog,
who slapped old yo’s head right into a fog.
A poet of note, and a pretty smart feller,
this old boy from Texas, in fact was not yeller.
He stood up to yo yo and spit in yo’s eye,
and said “your an idjit, and cannot deny,
that you are a troll, and an ignorant cuss,
I don’t understand why you make all this fuss!
If in fact you don’t like what is written down here,
crawl back where you came from, we won’t shed a tear.”
Then yo in a fit of dismay and chagrin,
did bust up his keyboard and was not heard again!

(Until he could sneak away from his housework in the little pink tutu, but that is another subject, for another verse.)
crm

+4 Good Comment? | | Report
from Eric Greene wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Cool concept, but would it be considered a "concealed" handgun?

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from Jere Smith wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

I am betting it will be in production in a year or less, I would prefer .357 Mag or .45ACP though!

0 Good Comment? | | Report
from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Same ole same ole short crotch
sooner or later even a mental midget like you gotta get bored with yourslef,.. boored with yourself ,YUK YUK

And the Doc says tell that little deviant to quite drinking and smkoing so much . Your brain is addled enough.
He thinks it causes you pick your nose with one finger while sctaching your a$$ with another.
Which makes it hard for you slide the buggers in your mouth with out peole seeing ,.. which is clearly a public heath issue.

And thank you again,. I just keep sending your mental convulsions to guys who can get it to truckers and oher memebers of a brotherhood
The ears are on for a little jerk water drunk who thinks he a poet in the lake Texoma area,. Maybe close to Dexter
Getting closer little man ?
Better get a good supply of those "depends" senor diapers
Certain now if your not a chronc pants wetter,.. you will be soon Bet your feet really smell bad too.
ALL that pee running down your leg into your boots

BOOO ! yuk yuk

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from Del in KS wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

That is a very innovative idea for self protection. Most liberals would not even realize it was a gun and get their panties in a wadd.

+2 Good Comment? | | Report
from crm3006 wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Well yo,
I hope you appreciated my last little attempt at verse, and the poetry soothed out the wrinkles in your little pea brain. I try to be understanding to the mentally deficient and verbally challenged at every opportunity.
But yo, let me dissuade you from your fruitless search for my whereabouts.
1. You would be arrested for criminal dumba$$ before you ever got across Oklahoma. (This is a felony there.)
2. They would probably add on charges of being a dumbyankee and impersonating a human being, which is either a Class C felony or Class A misdemeanor, I disremember which. Felony, for trolls, I think.
3. When they discovered you wearing your pink undies during the mandatory strip search, redneck deputies would throw you in a cell with mean biker chicks, who would probably have you in lipstick and your hair curled and legs shaved in about fifteen minutes.
4. The folks around Grayson and Cook Counties have been shooting a lot of feral hogs and coyotes lately, and a troll such as yourself would most assuredly be picked off as one or t'other.
5. In light of your hostile attitude and general mean disposition towards myself and my person. I have taken the precaution of arming myself with a mesquite switch, about three feet long. Beware, yo, I did NOT trim off the thorns!
Now, ya'll have a nice day, yo.

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from Jere Smith wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

How to win a war!

Drafting Guys over 60----this is funny & obviously written by a Former Soldier-

New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 60!

I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.

For starters: Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep. I'm tired and hungry.' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some asshole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.

An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a.m. Old guys always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, 'I'm tired and can't sleep,' and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical s-of-a-b....

If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.

Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.

They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any push ups after completing basic training.

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've
never seen anyone outrun a bullet.

An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.

These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.

Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple of million pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that their best years are already behind them.

(How about recruiting women over 50 with PMS??? You think men have attitudes...ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!! If nothing else, put us on border patrol....we will have it secured the first night.)

Share this with your senior friends. It's purposely in big type so
they can read it.

No virus found in this incoming message.

+5 Good Comment? | | Report
from Bella wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

As a menopausal woman who is also 50+ (and occasionally a mean biker chick too)_I might not be averse to an armed vacation up in some mountainous region (provided it don't get too hot there). I could be into putting the high heeled boot in for World Feminism. We could recruit the Lesbian Avengers, the Taliban would flee in terror at the notion of vicious bull daggers coming over the hill armed to the teeth. Then how about recruiting Tranniegirls for the fight, I've met some trannies who were frightening Without a gun!
Our teen aged children are much too precious to send off to get shot up by Islamic fundies, Lets recruit Christian fundies for the fight! they are the only ones really interested in Crusades anyway. We'd just have to keep reminding 'em that the Lesbian Brigade and the Transgender assault force dislike the Taliban as much as they do. The enemy of my enemy is my friend!

+2 Good Comment? | | Report
from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Moshie Good one !!!!

Couple guys I know who actually HAVE been shot at
and myself had a conversation ( maybe bull session says it bettr ) not dissimilar to your post.

Said conversation was augmented by a modest but appropriate volume of Scotch and Aquivit (a traditional drink in Norway Sweden & Denmark )
which was of course accompanied by food ,..
We never just drink ,.there is always food,.
So we dont our brians boiled like that little pi$$-ant from texas.

That I can see 60 not far down the road is spoofed by the above mentoned guys,. who are all passed (in there words) the geezer mark.
One Marine Sargent two army grunts and a ( lifer noncom officer) who takes extreamly well the unmercifull fricking heat we give him.
About , the military ground forces in general being one giant cluster f ,.. expecially in a fight.
No names or rank to protct him,. but he will and does
agree when no one but us can hear. YUK YUK

None of us served together,. haveing become friends later .
But as is our custom around the hoidays we got together.

I had a burn going anyway ,.. was ( still am ) pi$$ed off at the idea were loosing peopele we dont need to loose. (this sue ot talking recently to tthree young soldiers back from the sand box )

The elder member of out little mutual admiration society knows it takes a lot to get me crankd up. But once the fire is lit, it aint pretty.
Seeing the road signs and knowing it took me over ten years to settle one score ,

As he told me later,. he undertook to lighten the mood by turning the conversaton ,.
Which he damn sure did ,. by starting out saying ya know ,. when I was 19 and in the core ( jar heads always say in the core )
I believed those f ing idiots and did sh !t becaise they said to do it.
Looking back a lot of it was so G D dumb and senceless ,.its a wounder Im not dead from command stupidity and its no G D wonder the only people who enlist are people under 21.
Fully 1/2 of what they use for brains is still silly puddy with a constant semi eeeeeeee- rection

At which point and I swear as i sit here
It wasn't word for word but so close it does not matter matter
He then proceeded to reiterated pretty much what you just posted
Using of course more graphic colorfull / language
intersperced with fequent f bombs.

He had us all laughing so G D hard we were crying .
Especially the part about getting up early to pee and securing the US boarders in one night.
Not to get ugly here but we all knew immdiatly an undertaking such as that by a bunch of cranky geezer soldiers
Fed up with patty cake diplomacy given sufficiant resources ,..would get that done pretty dam quick even if did tale longer than one night.
Long time since my sides hurt from laughing but they did that afternoon.

Hell Im laughing now ,.. and he only resaon I didnt spray my monitor (with coffee) is that I didnt have any im my mouth.

Have a great day Moshie &
thank you again for making mine.

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Hey short crotch

Got that warm squishy feeling in your teeeny tiney little cowbay boots today , YUK YUK
"Depends" ( the senor diaper ) is your answer,.. squirting in your blue geans long enough will sooer or later case a rash ,. and the smell ?,.. nasty.
Would it help if I sent you money to buy multiple pairs of geans,..
So when you are standing around drunk with your mouth running and you suddently think of me ,..
and start to pi$$ your self (Like my frends wifes toy wiener dog) you'll have a pair or two to switch off too.
Just send me your address and a check will follow

BOOOOO ! YUK YUK

0 Good Comment? | | Report
from crm3006 wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

yo-
If you feel you must contribute money to a worthy cause, send a check to the I.S.O.T.E. Even the paltry amount you could send would pay for a postage stamp.

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Hmmmm .,....well short crotch it gets better

Paltry ?? YUK YUK
Another salty word from the squirting little man.

You cant afford a Trijicon ?
I would then,.here with submit sir ,.. your way the H over your head with me .
And thats not a shot,.. (little big shot) ,..
That is a curtisy,..
As I said you make mistakes and that was critical,.

Boots getting that warm squishy feeling again.
Jaaaaysus ,. do you target pratice at your own feet.

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from CJ wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Yohan

I say again, Romeo Oscar Tango Foxtrot Lima Mike Alfa Oscar breaks with the cyber whiz wheel to be "Rollnig On The Floor laughing My A$$ Off" !

Bella

Plus 1 for your post above. Boss came over asking me WTF I was laughing about! Some folks just don't have a sense of humor ergo the -1's I suppose.

crm3006 and Yohan

No pluses or minuses for you cowboys! I just enjoy the show, but want to avoid the splatter. One fight I'm staying out of....LOL

0 Good Comment? | | Report
from crm3006 wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

yo-
For your elucidation I just placed an order for a new
Trijicon, and the I.S.O.T.E.* needs your contribution far more than I. Over my head? I'm not even up to my boot-soles with an ignoramus like you.

*International Society Of Troll Eradicators

+1 Good Comment? | | Report
from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Short crotch ,. shiiiiiaaaat,..
in your broke drunk A$$ mind.

Stand down "little big man" u done shot your tiny little wad .
IE: you aint no fun no more
Done with ya ,..

0 Good Comment? | | Report
from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

cj

wtf? over

0 Good Comment? | | Report
from 86Ram wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

I'll take 4 please ... and throw in a t shirt too.

Definately thinkin outside the box

+2 Good Comment? | | Report
from AustinMartin wrote 4 years 10 weeks ago

That is awesome! would be a great side arm for police officers.

-2 Good Comment? | | Report
from jtboles wrote 4 years 10 weeks ago

sign me up for one of those. That would be perfect for where i live cause of all of the darn bears up here.

0 Good Comment? | | Report

Post a Comment

from Sb Wacker wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Great toy. Terrifying beard.
SBW

+6 Good Comment? | | Report
from buckhunter wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Junk? If I had that night crawler hunting none of those little b@st@rds would get away.

+5 Good Comment? | | Report
from fitch270 wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Gives new meaning to "concealed carry".
I wonder how many people would pull a Plaxico on themselves trying to open that thing up.

+5 Good Comment? | | Report
from Jere Smith wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

How to win a war!

Drafting Guys over 60----this is funny & obviously written by a Former Soldier-

New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 60!

I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.

For starters: Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep. I'm tired and hungry.' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some asshole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.

An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a.m. Old guys always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, 'I'm tired and can't sleep,' and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical s-of-a-b....

If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.

Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.

They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any push ups after completing basic training.

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've
never seen anyone outrun a bullet.

An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.

These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.

Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple of million pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that their best years are already behind them.

(How about recruiting women over 50 with PMS??? You think men have attitudes...ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!! If nothing else, put us on border patrol....we will have it secured the first night.)

Share this with your senior friends. It's purposely in big type so
they can read it.

No virus found in this incoming message.

+5 Good Comment? | | Report
from Bella wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Reminds me of a toy I had when I wuz a lil girl, back in the 60's. The "radio rifle" capgun toy looked like a radio of the day, but press the secret button and FWING the stock flips down and the barrel pops out! This was a toy associated with "Man from U.N.C.L.E." about the same size and coloration as the gizmo featured.
I'm certain it would be useful in some situations, but If I had a pistol in my pocket and needed it badly all at once, I wouldn't want something I'd have to unfold before I could put lead on target.

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from crm3006 wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Yo- You asked for it, you got it! Have a nice day!

THE TROLL
By crm3006 (The Poet Lariat)

Part III

A pismire sized brain in an over thick skull,
no wonder yo's writings are stupid and dull.
His fantasy life, as composed by himself,
would put a good novel right back on the shelf.
However, yo's writing was nothing but fiction,
horrendous in spelling, and syntax, and diction.
His mythical deeds, as written by him,
Just barely left out, he taught fish how to swim.
Yo was a great HERO, in his mind, at least,
but all of the bloggers thought yo was a beast.
In this supposition, they were not far wrong,
for yo yo had been with the trolls for too long.
Subsisting on nonsense, lived under a bridge,
'til even the trolls kicked him out on the ridge.
Where yo yo was forced to live under a rock,
whilst typing his stupid, and ill composed schlock.
The Sasquatch side of yo's family, you see,
had banished young yo yo when he was but three,
for misdeeds so blatant, and mischief, and crime,
no one can describe them without lots of time.
But yo, in his duncical, ignorant way,
was going to have his political say.
"An Internet troll is what I'll become,
and though they don't read me, and call me a bum,
I will bother the masses and spread out my hype,
and to make it the worse, I just cannot type!"
So, equipped with computer, and on to the ‘Net,
old yo was the stupidest poster as yet.
Until he encountered a man on the blog,
who slapped old yo’s head right into a fog.
A poet of note, and a pretty smart feller,
this old boy from Texas, in fact was not yeller.
He stood up to yo yo and spit in yo’s eye,
and said “your an idjit, and cannot deny,
that you are a troll, and an ignorant cuss,
I don’t understand why you make all this fuss!
If in fact you don’t like what is written down here,
crawl back where you came from, we won’t shed a tear.”
Then yo in a fit of dismay and chagrin,
did bust up his keyboard and was not heard again!

(Until he could sneak away from his housework in the little pink tutu, but that is another subject, for another verse.)
crm

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from Brittle wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

that was cool he opened it and i was like wow a GUN

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from crm3006 wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

What is the price? Probably pay for a good elk hunt and licence for what you would give for that gadget. If it was built around a Kimber platform, maybe.

Yo-Proud of you, sonny. Three words without a misspelled one, and not one yuk yuk. Do you think you need a big bad hideout gun to protect you from your Sasquatch relatives, irritated Irishmen, or just midget poets?
Have a nice day, yo!

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from WA Mtnhunter wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

I think someone just poked the yellow jacket nest.....

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from willkillsdeer wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

some body better tell James bond somebody shanked his gun

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from WA Mtnhunter wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

crm3006 and Yohan

You guys are killing me! ROTFLMAO

If I see someone in the future unfolding a little toolkit/flashlight combo in my direction, I might just have to issue one each double tap with a closer! LOL

Moishe:

Absolutely! The thugs of the world should take notice!

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from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

I want one

+2 Good Comment? | | Report
from Clay Cooper wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

I LIKE THAT!

Barrel is less than 16 inches

DARN!

+2 Good Comment? | | Report
from willkillsdeer wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

some body better tell James bond somebody shanked his gun

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from Jim in Mo wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

No caliber mentioned but of course it must be 9mm, cool for me I'd love one for my evening walks.

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from O Garcia wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

and survival weapon, of course.

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from Carney wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Sort of makes the "MagLite" billy club concept seem like the dark ages!

So it maybe isn't at the top of my list but how could a guy not want one?!?! I'd carry it in my back pocket for sure!

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from Jere Smith wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

To the people who think this is a bad Idea, bear in mind that the world as we know it now... is much more dangerous then the one us "Ol Fahts" remember fondly. I for one would not buy it but I never leave the house without at least ONE or more of my pistols anymore. Also carry in plain sight either a "Tire Thumper" Multipurpose Tool ;) or 6 Cell Maglight in the truck. THINK before you speak.

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from SL wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

"We need to hang together, or we'll HANG together."

You probably WILL hang way sooner if you hang out with the rambo crowd than if you stick to the time tested hunters/conservationists. Your choice, though.

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from JD wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Seems like another solution just looking for a problem :-}

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from WA Mtnhunter wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

IowaGuy

That should be self-evident.....

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from WA Mtnhunter wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Hey Yohan,

Skip down a few posts and analyze our new friend 'Arcamedies'. Might be a hoot for you and the Doc.

Best regards,

WMH

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from Del in KS wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

That is a very innovative idea for self protection. Most liberals would not even realize it was a gun and get their panties in a wadd.

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from Bella wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

As a menopausal woman who is also 50+ (and occasionally a mean biker chick too)_I might not be averse to an armed vacation up in some mountainous region (provided it don't get too hot there). I could be into putting the high heeled boot in for World Feminism. We could recruit the Lesbian Avengers, the Taliban would flee in terror at the notion of vicious bull daggers coming over the hill armed to the teeth. Then how about recruiting Tranniegirls for the fight, I've met some trannies who were frightening Without a gun!
Our teen aged children are much too precious to send off to get shot up by Islamic fundies, Lets recruit Christian fundies for the fight! they are the only ones really interested in Crusades anyway. We'd just have to keep reminding 'em that the Lesbian Brigade and the Transgender assault force dislike the Taliban as much as they do. The enemy of my enemy is my friend!

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from 86Ram wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

I'll take 4 please ... and throw in a t shirt too.

Definately thinkin outside the box

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from PbHead wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Is it a holster? A case? A flashlight container? Wow! I bet the boys at the BATF will being staying up at night to figure this one out.

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from gman3186 wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

thats awesome and for our guys over seas thats another gun they can pack with them and one that does not take much room at all

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from JohnR wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

That's old news. I saw that demo a year ago but I have to admit I sure would like to own one.

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from O Garcia wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

except for the part where he says "folding machine gun". already too many people are confused about machine guns, leading to many types of civilian firearms being banned as assault weapons.

but it's cool. would make a cool "secret service" type weapon. make it a 10mm Auto and our advocate Ted Nugent would be jumping up and down (he's a Glock 20 fan).

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from Zermoid wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Not useful for hunting????

That depends on WHAT you are hunting and WHERE........

:-)

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from ingebrigtsen wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

seems bulky compared to a glock 18.. but more controllab le in fullautofire.. nothing special bout it but the obvious camouflage of looking like something harmless..

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from elmer f. wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

W O W !!! I NEED-A-WANA-GOTTA-HAVEA ONE OF THOSE! I THINK THEY SHOULD GO AHEAD AND PRODUCE IT. IT WOULD SELL!

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from Flashpowderhal wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

The really sad thing is you guys are fighting among yourselves. That makes the anti-gunners really happy.

You'll let them ban guns that look like AK's and AR's, then next month they'll come for your Remington 870's and lever-actions. Remember, "We need to hang together, or we'll HANG together."

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from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Moshie ,. well said

Short crotch,. a poet you aint
But a fool ??? U bet
Your just not bright little man too many mistakes

As I say dont gamble
but I would take odds now one day in the future your standing around drunk,. shooting your mouth off, picking your nose and eating it.

And all of a sudden you hear "YUK YUK"
right behind you .
Probably makes sence to start wearing "depends" ole boy If you don't already ,. YUK YUK
By the way your new name is some cirlces is
the weiner dog that might,. YUK YUK

IE: previous post
A friend and his wifer compared you to their toy weiner dog . barks at everthing acts like he weighs 80 lbs with 12" schwartz ,.. but pi$$es himself every time someone knocks on the door,.or it thunders.

Yup that would be you little man,.

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from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Fash powder And SL ,. of course you have the right mentality
but you have to admit ,. thats one cool gadget.

Best for law enfrcement homelansd security etc etc.
ask that former NY City Cop ,.Polumbo? ( maybe )
At times the bad guys better armed than the good guys.
It would be a very good alternative to .
A call coming to dispacth saying shots fired
Im out gunned,. need back up ?
Other than that your right .
Unless,.. you could get that thing to fire rubber bullets.
Great short range detrerent to underware bombers

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from hengst wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

What Moishe said !!!! Magpul does not make junk alot of us in my unit have spent a litle bit of cash on magpul products and have not been let down.....Anyone wanting one of these might want to consider a concealed weapons permit

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from Amflyer wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

SL, my post was most definitively tongue-in-cheek.

Cheers

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from crm3006 wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Oh no, yo-
You have just blown your spelling attaboy all to hell, and never said why you need the James Bond hideout gun.
Sounds like your tutu is all in a wad. Should I write more verse to soothe your troubled soul?

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from Eric Greene wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Cool concept, but would it be considered a "concealed" handgun?

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from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Same ole same ole short crotch
sooner or later even a mental midget like you gotta get bored with yourslef,.. boored with yourself ,YUK YUK

And the Doc says tell that little deviant to quite drinking and smkoing so much . Your brain is addled enough.
He thinks it causes you pick your nose with one finger while sctaching your a$$ with another.
Which makes it hard for you slide the buggers in your mouth with out peole seeing ,.. which is clearly a public heath issue.

And thank you again,. I just keep sending your mental convulsions to guys who can get it to truckers and oher memebers of a brotherhood
The ears are on for a little jerk water drunk who thinks he a poet in the lake Texoma area,. Maybe close to Dexter
Getting closer little man ?
Better get a good supply of those "depends" senor diapers
Certain now if your not a chronc pants wetter,.. you will be soon Bet your feet really smell bad too.
ALL that pee running down your leg into your boots

BOOO ! yuk yuk

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from crm3006 wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Well yo,
I hope you appreciated my last little attempt at verse, and the poetry soothed out the wrinkles in your little pea brain. I try to be understanding to the mentally deficient and verbally challenged at every opportunity.
But yo, let me dissuade you from your fruitless search for my whereabouts.
1. You would be arrested for criminal dumba$$ before you ever got across Oklahoma. (This is a felony there.)
2. They would probably add on charges of being a dumbyankee and impersonating a human being, which is either a Class C felony or Class A misdemeanor, I disremember which. Felony, for trolls, I think.
3. When they discovered you wearing your pink undies during the mandatory strip search, redneck deputies would throw you in a cell with mean biker chicks, who would probably have you in lipstick and your hair curled and legs shaved in about fifteen minutes.
4. The folks around Grayson and Cook Counties have been shooting a lot of feral hogs and coyotes lately, and a troll such as yourself would most assuredly be picked off as one or t'other.
5. In light of your hostile attitude and general mean disposition towards myself and my person. I have taken the precaution of arming myself with a mesquite switch, about three feet long. Beware, yo, I did NOT trim off the thorns!
Now, ya'll have a nice day, yo.

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from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Moshie Good one !!!!

Couple guys I know who actually HAVE been shot at
and myself had a conversation ( maybe bull session says it bettr ) not dissimilar to your post.

Said conversation was augmented by a modest but appropriate volume of Scotch and Aquivit (a traditional drink in Norway Sweden & Denmark )
which was of course accompanied by food ,..
We never just drink ,.there is always food,.
So we dont our brians boiled like that little pi$$-ant from texas.

That I can see 60 not far down the road is spoofed by the above mentoned guys,. who are all passed (in there words) the geezer mark.
One Marine Sargent two army grunts and a ( lifer noncom officer) who takes extreamly well the unmercifull fricking heat we give him.
About , the military ground forces in general being one giant cluster f ,.. expecially in a fight.
No names or rank to protct him,. but he will and does
agree when no one but us can hear. YUK YUK

None of us served together,. haveing become friends later .
But as is our custom around the hoidays we got together.

I had a burn going anyway ,.. was ( still am ) pi$$ed off at the idea were loosing peopele we dont need to loose. (this sue ot talking recently to tthree young soldiers back from the sand box )

The elder member of out little mutual admiration society knows it takes a lot to get me crankd up. But once the fire is lit, it aint pretty.
Seeing the road signs and knowing it took me over ten years to settle one score ,

As he told me later,. he undertook to lighten the mood by turning the conversaton ,.
Which he damn sure did ,. by starting out saying ya know ,. when I was 19 and in the core ( jar heads always say in the core )
I believed those f ing idiots and did sh !t becaise they said to do it.
Looking back a lot of it was so G D dumb and senceless ,.its a wounder Im not dead from command stupidity and its no G D wonder the only people who enlist are people under 21.
Fully 1/2 of what they use for brains is still silly puddy with a constant semi eeeeeeee- rection

At which point and I swear as i sit here
It wasn't word for word but so close it does not matter matter
He then proceeded to reiterated pretty much what you just posted
Using of course more graphic colorfull / language
intersperced with fequent f bombs.

He had us all laughing so G D hard we were crying .
Especially the part about getting up early to pee and securing the US boarders in one night.
Not to get ugly here but we all knew immdiatly an undertaking such as that by a bunch of cranky geezer soldiers
Fed up with patty cake diplomacy given sufficiant resources ,..would get that done pretty dam quick even if did tale longer than one night.
Long time since my sides hurt from laughing but they did that afternoon.

Hell Im laughing now ,.. and he only resaon I didnt spray my monitor (with coffee) is that I didnt have any im my mouth.

Have a great day Moshie &
thank you again for making mine.

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from crm3006 wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

yo-
If you feel you must contribute money to a worthy cause, send a check to the I.S.O.T.E. Even the paltry amount you could send would pay for a postage stamp.

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from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Hmmmm .,....well short crotch it gets better

Paltry ?? YUK YUK
Another salty word from the squirting little man.

You cant afford a Trijicon ?
I would then,.here with submit sir ,.. your way the H over your head with me .
And thats not a shot,.. (little big shot) ,..
That is a curtisy,..
As I said you make mistakes and that was critical,.

Boots getting that warm squishy feeling again.
Jaaaaysus ,. do you target pratice at your own feet.

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from crm3006 wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

yo-
For your elucidation I just placed an order for a new
Trijicon, and the I.S.O.T.E.* needs your contribution far more than I. Over my head? I'm not even up to my boot-soles with an ignoramus like you.

*International Society Of Troll Eradicators

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from Woodstock wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

For the price of a silly gizmo like that, I could pay for a really cool hunt somewhere.

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from Amflyer wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

To all of you that think this is stupid...keep in mind that the name of the magazine and website is "Field and Stream." What do you expect to find?

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from SL wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

"To all of you that think this is stupid...keep in mind that the name of the magazine and website is "Field and Stream." What do you expect to find?"

Stories on gadgets that can be used while hunting and fishing that's what. This particular gadget has no use in either. Of course there are those these days who think it's cool to hunt deer with and AR-15 or AK-47, and many magazines are spewing a similar tune also to help attract advertising dollars. All BS in my opinion that will probably doom the true sportsman and bring him down to the same level as the many Rambo wannabe's out there. Very sad.

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from IowaGuy wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

And the practical, legitimate use of this thing is???????????????

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from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Wa Mtn Hunetr

WTF? Over
Who? what? is Arcamedies.?
Looked dont see ,..

Just had a slug of busness hit so time will be limited here for a while.

: ) Just checked into see if the killer Wiener dog was licking his own 3 " d k again yuk yujk

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from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

wa mtn hunter
from above rotflmao?

Romeo , oscar tango foxtrot ( time zone cst utc +6 ) Lima mike alfa oscar ? again wtf ? over

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from Jere Smith wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

I am betting it will be in production in a year or less, I would prefer .357 Mag or .45ACP though!

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from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Hey short crotch

Got that warm squishy feeling in your teeeny tiney little cowbay boots today , YUK YUK
"Depends" ( the senor diaper ) is your answer,.. squirting in your blue geans long enough will sooer or later case a rash ,. and the smell ?,.. nasty.
Would it help if I sent you money to buy multiple pairs of geans,..
So when you are standing around drunk with your mouth running and you suddently think of me ,..
and start to pi$$ your self (Like my frends wifes toy wiener dog) you'll have a pair or two to switch off too.
Just send me your address and a check will follow

BOOOOO ! YUK YUK

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from CJ wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Yohan

I say again, Romeo Oscar Tango Foxtrot Lima Mike Alfa Oscar breaks with the cyber whiz wheel to be "Rollnig On The Floor laughing My A$$ Off" !

Bella

Plus 1 for your post above. Boss came over asking me WTF I was laughing about! Some folks just don't have a sense of humor ergo the -1's I suppose.

crm3006 and Yohan

No pluses or minuses for you cowboys! I just enjoy the show, but want to avoid the splatter. One fight I'm staying out of....LOL

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from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Short crotch ,. shiiiiiaaaat,..
in your broke drunk A$$ mind.

Stand down "little big man" u done shot your tiny little wad .
IE: you aint no fun no more
Done with ya ,..

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from yohan wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

cj

wtf? over

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from jtboles wrote 4 years 10 weeks ago

sign me up for one of those. That would be perfect for where i live cause of all of the darn bears up here.

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from Woodstock wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

For the price of a silly gizmo like that, I could pay for a really cool hunt somewhere.

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from AustinMartin wrote 4 years 10 weeks ago

That is awesome! would be a great side arm for police officers.

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from SL wrote 4 years 11 weeks ago

Just some more paramilitary junk that is of absolutely NO use to the typical hunter.

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