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Mine would have to be, "pull my finger."
If...? Pfft... If your aunt had balls she'd be your uncle!!!
Old age and treachery will overcome youth and skill every time.
Yep. Slight variation: old age and treachery will outdo youth and enthusiasm every time!
I don't know if this is exactly a one liner but it is funny:
A three legged dog walks into a bar and slams a gun down on the counter and says "I'm lookin' for the man that shot my paw."
The Cops gave me a ticket for Off-Roading,
But it turns out they were stopping all vehicles driving down that particular sidewalk.
Two goldfish are in a tank, one looks at the other and says, "Hey you know how to drive this thing?"
I went out on the ice today to take a poll and see how the fish were biting. I had no idea those ice fishermen could chase me that fast in those big, clumpy boots.
A great one from my dad-
"If bullsh!t were music, that fella'd be a brass band..."
if your hunting buddy, friend, or neighbor tags a small buck a good one liner is " my daughter/sister passed up on that buck last week.
Did you hear what happened when the fat lady backed into the airplane propeller? Disaster.
A man walks into a bar with jumper cables hanging around his neck. The bartender says, "I'll serve you as long as you promise not to start anything."
Hi...
Two lawyers walked into a bar. Shouldn't the second one have seen it coming...??
Wish in one hand, crap in the other, see which one gets full first.
Putting that boys brain in a matchbox would be like putting a BB in a boxcar!
Put his brain in a hummingbird and it would fly upside down and backwards and suck a mule's a$$ for a morning glory!
A Hooker, a Priest, and a Rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender say's "What is this, a joke?"
Whiskey tastes better by a campfire, even if there's a bug in your glass.
A grizzly bear takes forever to make up his mind when the bartender asks what he'll have. Bartender asks, "Why the long pause?" and the bear says, "Oh, these? I use them for fishing."
Post a Reply
Mine would have to be, "pull my finger."
The Cops gave me a ticket for Off-Roading,
But it turns out they were stopping all vehicles driving down that particular sidewalk.
Hi...
Two lawyers walked into a bar. Shouldn't the second one have seen it coming...??
If...? Pfft... If your aunt had balls she'd be your uncle!!!
Old age and treachery will overcome youth and skill every time.
Yep. Slight variation: old age and treachery will outdo youth and enthusiasm every time!
I don't know if this is exactly a one liner but it is funny:
A three legged dog walks into a bar and slams a gun down on the counter and says "I'm lookin' for the man that shot my paw."
Two goldfish are in a tank, one looks at the other and says, "Hey you know how to drive this thing?"
I went out on the ice today to take a poll and see how the fish were biting. I had no idea those ice fishermen could chase me that fast in those big, clumpy boots.
A great one from my dad-
"If bullsh!t were music, that fella'd be a brass band..."
Did you hear what happened when the fat lady backed into the airplane propeller? Disaster.
A man walks into a bar with jumper cables hanging around his neck. The bartender says, "I'll serve you as long as you promise not to start anything."
Wish in one hand, crap in the other, see which one gets full first.
Putting that boys brain in a matchbox would be like putting a BB in a boxcar!
Put his brain in a hummingbird and it would fly upside down and backwards and suck a mule's a$$ for a morning glory!
A Hooker, a Priest, and a Rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender say's "What is this, a joke?"
Whiskey tastes better by a campfire, even if there's a bug in your glass.
A grizzly bear takes forever to make up his mind when the bartender asks what he'll have. Bartender asks, "Why the long pause?" and the bear says, "Oh, these? I use them for fishing."
if your hunting buddy, friend, or neighbor tags a small buck a good one liner is " my daughter/sister passed up on that buck last week.
Post a Reply