Hippos boil out of the bush, but not to stomp you. Hippos come up on land in the evening to feed and fart, and when they’re done feeding and farting they head back for water. They feel very strongly about water, and if anything gets between them and it they will trample the obstruction. If you happen to be on a hippo trail through high grass, you had best get out of the way quickly. Hippos are prone to panic, much like the news staffs of the major networks, and you don’t want to obstruct anything that weighs 6,000 pounds, is farting for all it’s worth, and is in a state of mental turmoil.