Chad Love: Your Mama Kills Turkeys

Ah, Thanksgiving. How I enjoy the enthusiastic communal consumption of a ruthlessly slaughtered and dismembered bird whose only crime was to be born with delicious breasts.

At least that’s how the nutters at PETA see it, and they’ve released a little Thanksgiving Game to illustrate just how gory and wrong consuming a turkey is.

Only problem is, the game is more hilarious than gruesome and hopefully it will lead to a spike in both turkey homicide and sales of the video game it parodies.

We shouldn’t be surprised, of course. Thanksgiving seems to be of particular irritation to the light-in-the-pleather-loafers weirdos at PETA, who would rather see us all be eating this stuff called tofurky.

Looks yummy, doesn’t it?

So in the spirit of PETA’s noble attempt, I’ll think I’ll try my hand at celebrating a more humane Thanksgiving by killing my turkey as quickly as possible. I think I might try a Gobbler Guillotine. You’ve got to see this video.