HOG HEROICS TAKE TRAGIC TURN

According to Fox News, poor, dead Fred had been sold to the Lost Creek Plantation, a hunting preserve by his owners, Rhonda and Phil Blissett, on April 29th and had been trying out his new-found freedom when young Jamison put the power to him. The Blissetts described him as a gentle, good-natured animal who was fond of sweet potatoes.

According to Alabama fish and game officials, no laws were broken when Fred made the sudden transition from on the hoof to on the hook, seeing that he was not born feral.