A century or so ago, when I was a baby editor, the magazine for which I worked received a news release from an inventor who had devised a simple system for getting Mr. Happy clear of heavy hunting pants and longjohns. He pointed out that if your member had shriveled to an inch and you had to extend it past 2 inches of clothing, you were in a world of trouble. His idea, and the product, made sense, mostly. But the project never went anywhere…as it were.