More Sad Tales of Computer-Age Hunters

After my outfitter friend and I had reviewed the various misfortunes that age brings down on your head, he lit into me.

“You people who make videos and TV shows have screwed up a whole generation of hunters. Every time someone buys something they get a free video, and the problem is, they believe them. They come out here expecting to get a 35-inch mule deer in an hour, because that’s what they see on the video. They don’t like to hunt. What they want is a big head dead on the ground, fast, so they can go to the airport and throw their camo in the dumpster and plug in their I-Pod and get back to their computer. That’s what they enjoy.

“And they’re competitive. I had a husband and wife out here a couple of years ago, and she and I crawled for a half an hour to get a chance at a really nice buck, and she made a very good shot on it. Was her husband pleased? Hell, no. He said he wanted a better god damn deer than his wife’s and he wanted it right now.

“It’s not just those two. I’ve seen it happen over and over again. Two friends come out to hunt and one of them gets something better than the other and when they leave they’re not friends any more. The old guys I guided would go the whole hunt, and pass up one deer after another, and if they didn’t see something they really wanted, they’d either not shoot at all or shoot a cull for meat and they’d go away happy. They were hunters. These people aren’t”

I pointed out that I dealt strictly in print, either on paper or in cyberspace, so he agreed that we could go prairie dog shooting in July.