I am 11 and a girl. i think that a 30-06 or a 6.8 SPC. Both would be good because they don't kick much but they have the power to thump a deer or bears.

I to am not a lady, but I like hunting with a 25-06. It has the recoil of like a 410 shot gun. idduckhntr is right you may want to look into the thumbhole stock it gives you more of a pistol type grip straighting out your wrist.

Go to a gun shop and shoulder a few rifles to see what fits best. Shot placement is the key...not the size of the bullet. Go for something small calibur like a .223, .22-250, or .243. These guns have a pretty flat trajectory, tend to have very little recoil, and will take down deer with good shot placement. If you're still having issues with recoil, have a gunsmith add a muzzle break to your gun...it should reduce the recoil significantly.

Part of the problem is just practice. Nothing wrong with that, but it will get better with time. (Had this problem starting out with trap too... now sporting clays is pretty good!) I also agree that youth models can really help with size issues. But rifle and shotgun are different animals in the sense of shooting (how many shots, type of positions, etc.) and so your expereinces with rifles may not be the same as shotguns. All the suggestions here are good... I might add a recoil pad to your bra strap to help with additional recoil if needed. Just get out there and shoot, try friends guns, go to NRA or BOW events where different rifles can be tried out. It is worth the time to find the right gun for you!