Out of deference (and fear for my job) to the numerous Field & Stream editors who call New Jersey home, I will not write a New Jersey-based “Swamp People” parody joke about this next story. But I sure hope that some of you will.

From this story on

A young alligator’s idyllic summer in a Kingwood creek ended on Saturday afternoon, July 28, after a few hours of hide and seek. Herk Rodweller, who lives just south of the Highlands Gourmet Market on Route 519, was taking out the garbage at about 10:30 a.m. on July 28, when he saw the 3-foot reptile in a creek about 30 feet from his garage. “At first I thought it was a big stick,” he said. “Then it moved.”

According to the story, firefighters were called in to pump out that section of creek, the fearsome beast was eventually captured and will probably be sent to an educational facility out of state. Authorities believe the juvenile alligator was an illegal pet that got dumped into the creek when it got too large. Either that or it’s the spawn of the giant subterranean alligators known to roam the sewers of nearby New York City. I’m saying it’s the latter.