This is a Job for Captain Venison!
Among the myriad things wrong with the world today, high on my list is the fact that the deer hunter...

Among the myriad things wrong with the world today, high on my list is the fact that the deer hunter is no longer a mainstream cultural hero. He was once, and you don’t have to go all the way back to Natty Bumppo to find him. Meanwhile, vegetable eaters world-wide have not just a hero, but a superhero–a strangely captivating weirdo from New Jersey singing the virtues of carrots and celery and turning children soft in several languages on You Tube. A bad dream indeed. Here he is in English:
What we–and children everywhere–need is a Captain Venison that’s even half so charismatic as Sesame Street’s Captain Vegetable, which you seriously have to admit is unequivocally, utterly brilliant.
What can I say? It’s been a long winter.